(think the dark scene in Titanic where this man on the rescue boat was calling out for survivors among the sea of floating dead - complete with echo effect please.)
"Is there anyone ooutt therreee....?"
"Can anyone hearrr meeee....?"
And now, picture my blog as Rose who stirs from her stupor and mumbles weakly, "Come back.. Come back.." then she swims across to wrestle the whistle out of a dead man's body and blows it with all her might...
"*BeeeeEEPppppp, beeeepp, beeeeeppp!" (whistle transiting to the sound of a radio alarm clock)
(in the mutton bird's tone)"It's the Great Gracias Junk YARD SALE!!"
Excuse my randomness, lameness and... lateness. It's my repressed expressiveness spilling over from a blog left vacant for far too long. To say I'm being inspired by the cobwebs in my room could be partially true. But come now... do you really believe I am the least bothered by those? Surely if you know me any better, only when somebody comes for a stayover will I attempt to hide the layers of dust away. Muahahaha!
Quite right.. yard sale. I digress. See, I'm an avid collector of everything in relation to my memory of any kind... from candy wrappers I got from various important people and receipts of gifts I bought for friends, to carcasses of dead insects and dustmites residing amid the inches of snow atop any untouched surface of my wintry bedroom. It's no wonder why most of my friends who stays over at my place end up sick. You need a certain level of immune system and ample good fortune to survive my venus flytrap of a house with its tempting 'nuaness'. Heh Heh Heh!
So! TODAY IS CLEANING UP DAY!! (like every other day I attempt to tell myself). Well, for starters, I truly believe a yard sale of my antique things - which has the ability to put any museum to shame - can make me a millionaire. (Have you ever seen my collection of things, honestly?)
You may wonder... What inspired this sudden ingenious idea to be rich? Let me assure you I am well financially. Don't really have to busk (or should I say 'baSk'. heh heh) on the streets as yet. My inspiration came from the loss of an Iphone which didn't belong to me. Just because it's 2G, I treated the object with as much as care as I would give my random soft toy - leaving it anywhere and talking to it only when I deem necessary. Alas, the 'unexpected' happened and I lost the precious possession that belonged to this someone I truly cared about but always took for granted. =S 真的真的对不起. You probably don't even know the existence of this blog but on the tiny chance that you might stumble upon it, I hope you can see where I'm coming from.
Today I made up my mind to clear my load of rubbish in the room because I am finally letting go of immaterial things. I reckoned if those memories actually requires the existence of a physical object for me to recall them... then that memory isn't much worth remembering now is it? A friend made me realised that today when she told me she didn't need the physical things because she kept those moments in her head. That's when I figured out that when your brain is filled to the brim with an excess of things... it naturally filters out the bad and keeps the good. And I'm teaching myself to do the same now that I've lost something that wasn't mine to lose. I ought to practise what I have preached and act the same way to myself as I've been cruel to you. Oh yes, I did have a spare phone that just wasn't working very well and didn't look half as prestigious as the glam looking 2G Iphone you lent me. But I was selfish. I must be the worst sibling in the world. Ok, maybe second worst considering the Griffin family in Family Guy... or third, if you count the Simpsons human. Bottomline is... I am an inconsiderate cow of a sister. That jackass of the person who stole your phone.. I curse him till the day he ______ (inhales deeply and say mentally to myself - Let it go. Let it go. Let it go.) Ok... I'm sorry it wasn't mine to let go. But I'm hoping in a warped way, I have kind of made it easier for you. It only takes a button to restore everything in my phone to factory settings, no? If only humans have an internal software like that. One click restores you to unblemished innocence. I wish. I'm truly sorry for the many things that I took for granted but at the same time... the idiot that I am cannot guarantee I won't hurt you again. I mean... you know me la... So next time just don't lend me anything that is of vast importance, no matter how much I whine.
Mushy apologies aside, there are a few things about myself that I still marvel at... even after all that has happened during this time and through these passing years. (Not in the way like how Barney affirms himself to be awesome... but for once I'm cynical as to whether that is a positive trait) - How very little I have grown and changed despite all the trials and tribulations. Yes, I am thick-skulled. The previous years and especially this current one, passed almost like a dream and I was in this constant bubble of god knows what. In my quest for constant adventure, I floated to the moon high on air and intoxicated with ecstasy, unaware of how much my feet have left the ground of reality. It took a couple of nudges and bumps to burst that bubble and send me bouncing back to earth. Bouncing, not crashing I'd say cos I've got a whole bunch of human slaves to cushion the impact - (roughly translates to: I've got great friends who got my back). Thank God for them, not that I was very much a woman of faith.
All it takes is a little inspiration, a huge mistake and a very guilty conscience for me to wake up from my slumber, clean up my act, liberate myself from the excess junk, remember the things that count and blog about it. (Ok that is quite a list... but you get the point!) I will not forget the past and what it took for me to get here. Be grateful and gracious, especially to my dearly loved ones. Do I trust myself to not lapse into that 'take things for granted' mode? Apparently not, but I sure as hell will try my best not to forget.
Now that wasn't too tough, was it? From one of 小G's favorite shirt quotes, "When life gives you lemons... you make lemonade." (or somewhere along those lines) And for those injured... remember how Gino used to say, "Pain is your best friend!" How else would stubborn people like us learn?
If 2010 was me dreaming in space, then 2011 will be me sowing my dreams on earth. (Cheesy I know, but give me some credit for trying, won't you? Wait till I'm a policewoman... 小心我代表月亮惩罚你!) Of course, they shall be realistic dreams. Mostly.
And if you're still looking for a gracias 2010 junk yard sale, check the rubbish dump of sengkang east way block XXX for leftover stock. Thank you for your interest and have a happy christmas.
As Raina (from America's Next Top Model cycle 14) puts it, "I'm a Ninja, Good Night."
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