There's this vicious cycle occurring: sadness -> frustration -> anger (repeat)
The Sadness
As Lisa leaves for Australia, I thought about how a great coach is leaving us. Thank you for giving me the opportunities, and valuing my abilities. Sometimes, all you need is that belief from someone to rekindle that fire. Lisa, thanks for rekindling mine. You coach with so much heart, it inspires. I'm so sad to see you go.
The Frustration
And there comes the time I keep blaming myself for all the many things I could have done better and whatever that I could have done more. So why didn't I? And honestly, what's the point of regretting now?
The Anger
See... here's the thing. Frustration with oneself is never good to have so in effort to make myself feel better, I channel it to somewhere else.
If I were a prima donna, I would send the following letter:
________________________________________
Dear What's-his-face,
Nations Cup is in less than a month's time and as much as I'd like to move on, it is very difficult to do so when training's canceled. I have heard of a wet weather program during my coaching courses. I understand that we were meant to have a coach who can come in early and take us through Nations Cup as that is the best arrangement according to higher authorities but something seems different. There's approx 3 weeks to train for the Nations Cup and the results of the short training regime with a new coach is curious. Luckily, Nations Cup is a smaller event as compared to the Worlds 2011 where the focus is on. Do consider the timeline and consequences before taking unconventional actions as world champs approaches.
P/S: We work better with a training plan that need not be done personally by someone such as yourself.
With Shingz,
Martyr Netballer
____________________________________________
But alas, I'm as disposable as a pantyliner and as fat as a cow. Sending in a letter as such will have me end up like a half done steak- easily cut into pieces and bloody enough. S'cuse my language, I'm bleeding.
I wonder how long this gloom cycle lasts. Probably till my PMS end. Oh, did I mention it's my birthday yesterday? How uneventful it seems after all the recent passings. I'm turning into a grouch.
Dry wit's wet with rain, here sarcasm's staked... the tears I restrained, there I smiled instead.
Perk up tomorrow! I mustn't grow old (in the heart I mean). ooo yea.
